the problem in me is that i never change. never even tried to move an inch. that's why im always stuck here. what a pathetic life i have. sigh.

in one month time, i'll be in china. hoooorrayy!! im looking forward to it. till then, i swear and promise i'll nvr contact xk until i come home. i will be good for both of us. not that im being 'xiao qi' to her or anything. i figure out is better we live that way. losing her i lose alot. she have been my closest friend so far. she gave me strength to everythiing. bcos of her, i manage to cast away my fear. really, to lose her i lose a lot. nvr i felt so pity for losing a friend but is better this way tho. she nv said sorry!! :(

fasting month. i hope this can be a smooth sailing month for me. i hope i can complete 27days left and hope i can fulfil my terawih prayer. g2g study. .

ya. i think i wan2 to somehting with math. =)

Eversince i fought wit xk that night, mainly is her fault for caci-ing my bro. she started to give me, cold treatment. i dont know why i bother but i really DO care. and it hurts like hell(eventhough nv been thru thr). why? is thr something she not telling me? she use to tell me everything but now.. heck. i hate this.

get back to chem report. bye.

people been talking about me. i dont like the feeling that everyone evrywhere knows everything about me. is fucking annoying. esp when people come to u and act like they care when they actually dont.

fought with xk. officially ignoring me eventhough xk is at wrong. wtf? and why do i care?

so tired. sacrifice so much for her and this is how she backfire me.

malacca-- this sat -- the moment i awaited and look forward for -- is canceled. im fucking pissed off.

wow. been neglecting my blog for almost a month already. sighness. stpm drive me up the wall!! my sickness is back..

people just tend to walk in and out of u just like that. im sick of friends but still need them so so so so much. why? after game yesterday, just realised that i could care and do so much for a friend and of course i do wat i do because im sincere and did not expect anything in return. but the way they just being ignorant to me hurt me most. i miss my old friends. really. but im not compatible with them. i need them so much but i dare not speak out. i have my own ego, too.

maybe i just should move on. move on. damn september 14th is coming. no wonder my sinus is back. somehow im gonna be okay without a guy by my side but not my friends. suddenly i miss London. there, people couldnt care less about u. everybody is busy with their thing. is their lifestyle. there's always a thing that keep u busy. with the solltice going keep changing everyyear. even if u r alone, u wont feel lonely anyway. because is just the way it is. as u walk on the street, u r not walking alone. everyone is at ur pace, even faster than u. i just love my life there although is only a short period. i so wanna go back to london and leave everything here behind let it rot becomes history to me. no one gonna care anyway.